5 "Are we there already?" moments

Number 1. Perhaps most startling of all, Zoralee now looks and acts like a GROWN UP baby. She has a whole range of decipherable emotions. My brother, Dave, is home for a bit between graduating from college and going to live in Portland (yay for my brother! That makes all my siblings to stick with one subject and stay in one or two locations long enough to obtain a bachelor's degree, butcept me! And I'm the oldest, the supposed example setter! How 'bout them apples! Yay!). Anyway, Zoralee was quite confused about Dave's presence in the house. Every time she'd see him for the first few days, it was clear she thought, "You're still here?! You are a nice boy, but you do not belong." By now she's diggin' him, but yeah, she crossed over some new threshhold of awareness about life around her, and it's just weirding me out a little.

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If Zoralee doesn't want to talk to you, or she's done

with a photoshoot, this is what she does.

Number 2: Zoralee's dresser has five drawers. So far, her currently-sized clothing have taken up two drawers (0-3 months, for instance), and the next size up took up two more drawers (3-6 months). I put receiving blankets in the fifth drawer and labeled them because it's an old dresser that's awkward to open, I have a poor memory, and I got sick of opening multiple drawers to find one item.

Last week, I had to take off the tape. I realized we are at the point where Zoralee's currently-sized clothing (roughly 6-9 months) needs an entire dresser. I wish I could emphasize to you how incredulous I was to grasp this. She's got a drawer's worth of long and short-sleeved onesies, a drawer for shirts and sleepers, a drawer for pants, one for dresses, and one for jackets and outdoor clothing. Her dresser is tall and skinny, so the drawers aren't huge, but still! All future clothing must stay in boxes in the closet. There's no way in the world that she NEEDS all these clothes, mind you. But I have already been selective, if you can believe that. And plus, her clothes take up more room now that she's bigger, a small nuance I hadn't considered. What it all means is that it will be a high crime if I ever put her in something non-cute or non-perfectly-functional-for-this-exact-moment-in-history.

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Number 3. I used to couldn't envision the time when we'd have to babyproof the house on account of Zoralee. Well, we're not totally there yet, but I can see it coming. And soon. She is rolling multiple times in a row, which means she could theoretically make it anywhere. Even up stairs if it weren't for a little thing we call gravity.

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Number 4: I think she's transitioning from three naps to two. She's five and a half months old. Does that seem about right? I haven't consulted a friend or a book or google on that specific issue.

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Number 5: Yesterday was the final reckoning of Zoralee's progress toward childhood (Well, for now. What's next - crawling?! Oh yeah, it is.) She snotted on my bath robed shoulder. It is her first real cold, with snot that comes out of the nostrils. So surprised was I that I had to take a photograph. It's faint in the picture; look closely.

Oh, that's another thing. The t-shirt she has on here is a REAL shirt, like real children wear, not a onesie with snaps.

Anyway, Aaaaagh!

a teensy depressing tidbit

I think our external hard drive essentially erased a couple massive folders of photos, specifically from summer 08 onward until Zoralee's birth. Don't ask me how. I'll ask YOU how, any technosaaviers out there. And if you can help me get those pictures back, you'll be my technosavior.

The pics included my last six months of pregnancy, my own shots of labor, my sister's wedding, Jason's work at the Park, and a bunch of stuff I haven't thought of yet but will be more depressed when I do. Fortunately, I think we can piece a representative selection together, from highlight cds we made for people at random times (and are now asking them to mail back), but I hadn't gotten around to making my own backup cds. I am a fool!

Moral of the story: back your documents up on disc! And print onto that old stuff we call "paper" any of the pictures you really, really like.

crunchin' the numbers

Sometimes this kid's brilliance scares me. Take this conversation:

Me: Zoralee, honey, I need to know what is 13.589204 x 3.0178399.
Zoralee: Hang tight, Ma.

crunch, crunch, crunch add a little spittle
lemme verify the maker of this thing...

Me: Quit messin' around. I need that figure.
Zoralee: Got it.

mother's day

It was my first Mother's Day as a mother with a child outside of the womb! My dear family and husband made sure I felt loved, and Zoralee chimed in as best she could. She peed all over our bed first thing in the morning - not her best effort - but there were plenty of smiles and screeches the rest of the day.
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I love being a mom. And actually, a simple day of recognition and time to reflect practically make up for five months of sleep-deprivation, anxiety over the potential hardships my child will face, the effort of creating a good parenting rhythm with my spouse, sorrow over time already gone, guilt over looking forward to the next stage, adjustment of my schedule to be nearly all baby all the time. Hm. That sounded sarcastic. I couldn't have intentionally written a better sarcastic sentence than that. But I am serious! It's important to catch little glimmers of appreciation every now and again. So, if you haven't yet, thank your mom for being your mom.
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People talk about a mother's patience, and now I get it. Being the primary care-giver of a baby is a gigantic adjustment of nothing less than your entire life. The image of a trillium ovatum flower is becoming important to me as it relates to the patience of motherhood, thanks to a very sweet Mother's Day write-up my husband gave me using this photo. We've been noticing this flower in the woods around here for the first time ever. They can take up to 15 YEARS to bloom and are very, very rare. They change to a beautiful color of purple later in the spring.

Now a couple pics of the one who has made me a mother.

First off, who has ever seen a cuter shadow than this?

(I doubt anyone.)

on Mother's Day:

And now, I'd like to pay a little tribute to a few special women. My mom is a helluva woman, as anyone who knows her will say. Well, they might not all quasi-swear like that, but you know. Just a sampling of things about her that I really appreciate are these:

• She is smart, practical, organized, and level-headed.
• She wants people to be recognized on their special days and for their accomplishments. This woman seriously writes hundreds of cards a month for people's birthdays, anniversaries, etc. If you'd like a personal card in the mail for whatever reason, email me and I'll pass your information on to my mother. The U.S. Postal Service is weathering this economic storm on account of her.
• If she has something negative to say, it is calculated and usually necessary.
• She has the patience of a Buddhist monk.
• She knows when and how to take a break.
• She loves her grand-daughter!
• She is hospitable, and she taught us how to share. I don't know how many times she came to us kids and whispered, "So-and-so is staying for supper; everybody take just one small piece of meat." (Okay, so some of that is the result of my dad being Mr. Sociable and inviting everybody to stay for a meal who happens to drop by. Which only further illustrates:)
• She is gracious.

Here's a four generation picture from my babyhood.

My only living Grandma (pictured above sporting the 'fro) is the embodiment of a perfect grandma. She:

• attended every last one of our recitals and concerts, ball games and sporting events
• always keeps snacks, gum, and an assortment of random emergency items in her purse (a trait which my mom inherited)
• thus, has a large purse
• rocked me in her rocking chair up into my teens
• has the most glorious, calming, off-key singing voice for during rocking
• is thoughtful, compassionate, and accepting of all manner of folk
• loves her great-grand-daughter!

Jason's mom, Barbara, is a great mother-in-law! How many people can say that? She is not a meddler, as many are prone to be. One of our best things in common is how much we love Jason, her "little dumpling." I don't call him that, naturally. She adores the ground on which he walks, which he has many a time declared to be a great source of confidence to him. Additionally, a few things I appreciate about her are that she:

• loves to travel and has a delightful spur-of-the-moment bug. If she finds a deal, she'll hop on an airplane tomorrow and be laying on a beach in the sun somewhere. That's the kind of action I like to see around here.
• is an optimist.
• is generous and quick to forgive.
• is strong and has an enduring will to live and experience life, despite chronic pain that started at a young age.
• loves her grand-daughter!
• is beautiful.

Here's a four generation pic from Zoralee's baby shower: Zoralee, me, my mom and Barbara (Jason's mom), and my grandma Louise.

more parenthood haikus

the attempt to conceive

Want to make baby.

Tell me how you made yours, k?

Will try anything.

(Rachel)

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Tried to make baby.

gave husband full body rash.

Maybe anxiety?

(Rachel)

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We will try again

With less pressure and stress, yes?

It shall be success.

(Rachel)

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want to be Mommy

to a little girl or boy

come hither, Husband

(Lori)

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want to be Grandma

to a little girl or boy

get busy, children

(Rena)

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Baby making tip -

The glow in the dark night cream

may have caused the rash.

(Darbi)

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Your friends are praying

your bodies will line up soon.

Mini skiier, come.

(Darbi)

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babies

lessons never end

for her, as it was for us

complete one, more come

(Jason)

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nursing in the dark

I learn power outtage'd clocks

blink once per second

(lori)

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first teething biscuit

days later, though she's been bathed,

Zor smells like maple

(lori)

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remember mornings

when you'd rise from bed alert?

these days, not so much

(lori)

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general parenthood

subbing every day

thoughts of my own through it all

we will be okay

(Christi)

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hair dryer is on

cannot hear them or see them

a five minute break

(Christi)

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we're the perfect team

tag team and fill every gap

mom and dad unite

(Christi)

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passive aggressive

criticisms wear me down

I'm doing my best

(Christi)

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five years have gone by

a dash from the first cry to

quoting movie lines

(Christi)

happy Cinco de Mayo!

doing the Mexican hat dance

five months old today!

our little gal in a big world

A few musings on Zor as she currently stands (or lays, really):

She is really into rolling over, although she doesn't just roll and roll. It's once over from back to tummy and sometimes back the other way. She's taking her time on it, along with laughing. She still hasn't fully laughed. Just her big smiles, screaches, deep breaths, and other indications that she's happy.

Loves to suck toes! Her own mostly, but anyone else's that get in the way.

Has been enjoying teething biscuits, and reaches for beverages when people are holding her and trying to take a drink. My mom gave Zor her first biscuit one evening when we were at a concert. These are shots from that:

Loves to pull blankets and clothes over her face and lay there breathing strangely, like she's suffocating. Naturally, I pull the blanket off in a high state of agitation, and there she is underneath, smiling. The other day, she was lying on the floor beside me while I worked at the table, and I heard her doing that breathing. I looked down in alarm, and there she lay watching me - with no blanket in sight. Then she smiled big. What a pickle.

For the most part, sleep is okay. She alternates; one night she'll sleep for long stretches, and the next she'll be up every four hours to nurse, or more often to fuss. The last couple of nights have been real sketchy for sleep, but I know the problem. Two nights ago I succumbed to a billboard advertisement for a coffee frosty at Wendy's. I split it with Jason, so come on - there shouldn't have been THAT much coffee in it. I drank it about 8 p.m. Zor went to bed around 9 and slept great, but when the coffee hit the breastmilk for our midnight feed, boy, howdy. She was up on the hour, and from 3 - 5 a.m. she was plumb awake and sociable. This wasn't good since I was leading worship the next morning at church and had a practice at 8:00 a.m. I hadn't lead worship in awhile and was anxious over it, so this didn't help. Needless to say, it took us the rest of Sunday to recover, into the night last night, and some today. I won't be making that mistake again soon.

She has started smiling for the camera, though that isn't any wonder, as many pictures as we all take of her. I try to be somewhat discreet so she doesn't get a big head.
She is interested in any one toy for less and less time anymore. We only have a few for her, which is intentional, but I might have to break down and make others out of household items or something. I dunno - she seems a little young for tupperware and pots and pans and whatnot. She isn't even sitting up. I remember when I was still pregnant and looked over at her up-and-coming toy basket. It cracked me up real good, because, gee whiz, talk about toy deprivation for a little kid. Now she's got a few more, so don't worry. Zoralee likes to watch the animals on the lawn. She especially loves Molly the Schnauzer and reaches for her, but Molly doesn't pay her much attention. Murray the Chihuahua, playful as can be, wishes she'd hurry and grow up. The horses are curious about her, and I have to keep the chickens from pecking her little worm toes.

conversations THROUGH babies (?)

I'm curious about this thing we adults do whereby we use babies and pets as conversation mediums. For example, the following conversation took place a couple of mornings ago while Jason was playing with Zor and I was cooking breakfast. (Rated PG)


Jason, to a fussy Z: Zoralee, what's your problem?
me: Be gentle with her! She's just tired.
Jason: Mama's trying to do attachment parenting with you. I'm doing dis-attachment. She's yin and I'm yang, because she has a yin and I have a yang.
me: Oh, Papa's not trying to do dis-attachment with you. That's ridiculous. Anyway, it was Papa's yang and Mama's yin that got us into this predicament.

I mean, we were talking to each other through our 5 month old daughter. I remember doing the same thing with our dog, Beth. I guess we only do this with people/animals who don't have a voice of their own. It would be a little loony to use a perfectly conversational fellow adult as our medium, with them sitting right there.

Other times, we'll put words into Zoralee's mouth, as though she's backing us up on some point, like, "Papa, Mam's really thirsty and could use a glass of water." Do we really think that a baby's supposed opinion lends credibility to what we're saying? If anybody has psychological insight into this phenomenon, do tell.

hellooo, ladies

Cock-a-doodle-doodle-doo-ster

You're our one and only rooster

If the hens had only knew, Sir

They'd have practiced shoo-a-shoo-ster

You'll take any hen to do-ster

Even though you're nothin' to her

They might wish for someone tru-er

But that's the nature of a rooster

We got ourselves a rooster last week! A friend had three, and begged us to take one off of his hands...for $6, so maybe it wasn't a total beg. Evidently, his hen to rooster ratio was too small, so the roosters weren't acting kindly toward one another. We got the trouble maker of his batch, whom J has named Six Dolla' Roo. We introduced him to the ladies at dusk when everybody was roosting, and we watched in the shadows for any drama. There wasn't much. The hens pecked at his bright red waddles and combs, an anomoly in their otherwise black-and-whiteness, and he explored the coop slowly, making small hesitant vocalizations. We left after 10 minutes, because nobody seemed too concerned with each other. Well, Jason peeked in about 3 minutes later, and who was on the top roost, with three hens on either side of him, and all the rest of the hens relegated to the bottom roost? You guessed it. Old Sixey.

looking the new guy over and cackling amongst themselves

Old Sixey might be my name for him, a blend between the fact that he was $6, is old compared to the hens (he's a year, and they're like three months), and that he's supposed to be sexy. Reminds me of this Jack Handy deep thought:
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For a while there, instead of calling Grandpa "Grandpa," I started calling him "Grandpappy." But he didn't like that, and asked me to go back to Grandpa. So I did, but I changed it a little. I put an "e" in instead of an "a," so it became "Grendpa." At first he didn't notice, but then he said, "What did you call me?" "Grandpa," I said. But then I went back to calling him Grendpa. Finally he just said to go ahead and call him Grandpappy, which I did, only I changed it a little bit to "Grendpeppy."
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Today, a bunch of us sat out on the lawn, watching how the dogs would respond to the chickens free ranging. They are behaving themselves, so we left the chickens out for the afternoon and evening. Near dark, Jason went out to see how Six Dolla' Roo had done in rounding the hens up into the coop. That's one of a rooster's main jobs, see. He was inside alright, settled in for the night on the top roost, with five hens. The other five were huddled together near our back porch, apparently waiting for Jason to come out and lead them home. Old Sixey better get it together. Jason figures he's so un-used to being top guy on the totem pole that he thinks having five hens is good enough.


If nothing else, I've got to say he is a quite stunning addition to the flock. He's huge compared to the hens, and it keeps surprising me how perfectly he MATCHES them. They are the same breed, so I don't know what I expected. It's like we special ordered a water pitcher to go with our dinnerware, and they all look perfect together.

Old Sixey and the coming storm

elks and deers

I think of Corky from the movie, "Waiting for Guffman," when I say elks and deers in the improper plural like that. That's a GREAT movie, if you're a fan of dry, mockumentary style humor.

Now then.

Doesn't Jason look determined here? Shoulders back. Jaw set.

He was getting out of the way, thinking I was photographing Zoralee.

It makes me giggle.

We went walking as a larger family group a few evenings ago (so, including Mom and Pops), to the woods nearby in search of the elk. It was blustery and cold, but we were rewarded with a fieldful of critters, which we watched for about twenty minutes. Here's a short clip that shows them in the distance. Sorry about the cruddy quality - it's with my point and shoot camera. Especially watch for the running deers' reflection in the puddle.